Every year on our anniversary, I go through our wedding photos and choose one I haven't used before. It's amazing, looking back at that day when we became The Rasmussens instead of just Jan and Krissy, seeing us as we were then, so happy, so young...so many things. It always reminds me of who we were, and how far we've come, as people and as a unit. At twenty-five and thirty-five, we were two people who had just said I do, bought a home, and were trying to figure out what came next. Now, at thirty-seven and forty-seven, with one nine- year-old and over a decade behind us, we've learned what we couldn't have imagined twelve years ago: it's not about what comes next. It's about what comes now, here, in this moment, when we're together.
This was a one-click wonder moment where we were just being Jaja and Shitzy, Old Man River and Krissy, and Mamma Tana captured it for us. After twelve years of marriage, I needed to recognize that this is our lifestyle, sans lighting, decent smiles, and clean hair...it's the truth, I guess, and that's why I've chosen this over those beautiful ceremony photos. I love those rare moments when we're fancy: a wedding, a date-night out , a holiday, but I love more the moments when we're being us, like this right here. A moment when you would think to come pick me up and make me smile after a long day, when you would love me and tease me, but also make me feel so special because as much as I laughed and laughed when you called my name and I saw you, I also melted a little when I saw your smile. You help me live in love every day, Jan, and I want to remember that always.
Twelve years ago, when I walked into the meadow toward you, all I knew was that I loved you, and I really couldn't wait to be done with wedding week so we could start being us.
Now, I know who that us is, in this moment, after twelve years: Old Man River and Shitzy: smashball partners for life, who will always choose daily fun over drama; who will shut down and close the world out when we need a reminder of the good life has to offer; who will always choose happy over sad, love over anger, and each other over anything else.
I will always choose you, Jan. Here's to another twelve years and counting of adventures, romantic moments, and imperfect photos. Happy anniversary.
xoxo